Synopsis: Five times Sam gets a boner because of Blaine, and one time he does something about it.
Sam’s just came back to Ohio to help out his old glee club friends, and he already has to fight to get his ideas heard. That new guy, Blaine, is totally judging him because of course, everyone in the club knows he used to “sell his body”. And apparently, body rolls are totally trashy and won’t work to win the judges over, even though Sam can see Blaine’s eyes trailing down to his dick every time Sam does a demonstration.
“I’m not for sale,” Blaine says, and his holier-than-thou attitude was already getting on Sam’s nerves, but now that does it.
Sam sees red and shoves Blaine. Prep Boy only has time to push him back before Mr. Shue gets between them, but Sam feels the adrenaline rising, the need to punch something. The guys are holding them apart so he can’t do anything, but the need keeps growing. He can see in Blaine’s eyes that the feeling is mutual, and that’s when Sam notices the huge boner growing in his own pants. He doesn’t understand why fighting with Anderson would have that effect on him, but he chalks it up to teen hormones and stops thinking about it.
Sam is really glad Blaine is feeling better. He’s his best bro and it was killing Sam to see him torturing himself like that. So Sam settled on a crusade to make him see he was a good person, and it’s going really well so far. Plus, Sam loved that it brought them really close and made them spend much more time together.
Painting the graffiti wall behind the school is an awesome idea because they can do it with the rest of the club and it’s hilarious to start a paint war – even though it’s a bitch to clean up.
So everyone starts throwing paint at each other and Sam paints a stripe in Blaine’s neck. He freezes for a second because Blaine’s skin covers itself in goose bumps and Sam really wants to see more skin, even though he doesn’t know why.
And then Brittany spreads a shitload of paint down Blaine’s neck and Blaine just stands there, smiling dumbly with his eyes closed, and it’s adorable. But the image that pops into Sam’s brain is far from being cute, and he struggles to hide the boner that just popped in his pants.
He really shouldn’t have watched facials porn last night.
So Sam decides that nothing else matters, and he’s already fucking perverted, so he might as well go all in. He grabs the nearest paint bucket and showers them all with white paint. Blaine gets most of it and Sam gets even harder as it splashes in Blaine’s perfectly gelled hair and Blaine giggles.
They finish painting the wall, and Blaine walks to the locker room to take a shower, looking at Sam expectantly.
Sam tries really hard to hide the fact that his brain just imploded, and he joins Blaine in the locker room, willing his dick soft.
Blaine has insisted all week that guys can be divas, and he decided to prove it to them. Sam has trouble wrapping his mind around the idea of a guy diva – he keeps thinking of long flowy hair and stilettos, and that doesn’t work with Blaine at all – so he decides to wait and see.
And then Blaine walks in the choir room, and at first, he looks like one of these Village People guys and it’s kinda hilarious. But then he starts playing the piano and it’s super impressive – Sam knew Blaine could play, but not that well.
And then Blaine gets rid of the gay biker cap and he suddenly looks very sexy and Sam is very conscious of his own hardening cock. He hopes no one notices, and he takes care to hide his crotch with his hands. Blaine kicks down the piano bench and he looks fierce, and Sam suddenly understands what he meant about guy divas.
Blaine is still singing, and everyone is clapping and cheering, and Sam claps in front of his crotch, hoping no one will look.
Blaine spends the whole guitar solo next to the guitarist, doing an epic air guitar solo and he’s really into it. Sam wonders how someone can look so dorky yet so sexy at the same time, and it’s super endearing.
And whoa, it totally looks like he’s got a crush on Blaine and really, Sam doesn’t know what to do about this information.
Sam knows Blaine probably has a crush on him – it’s been pretty obvious for months now. He decides to try to make Blaine confess, so he finds a way to admit a guilty pleasure so that Blaine will feel safe to confess his crush on him.
But Blaine admits his love for Wham, and Sam is a bit disappointed, but it doesn’t matter when he sees Blaine in costume. Blaine is wearing short shorts – but like really short, and dammit, his legs are amazing – fishnet fingerless gloves, earrings, and his fingernails are painted. He looks super sexy and Sam wonders how he’ll be able to focus on the song.
And that’s when he notices Blaine’s hair. He’s not wearing gel, and his curls are free, and it looks so soft that Sam just wants to bury his fingers in it.
The song starts and Blaine stands really close to him. They are literally dancing together and Sam didn’t know how much he wanted that.
And then Blaine sings about being warm in bed and Sam can’t think of nothing but being in bed with him. Suddenly Sam is really glad he’s holding a guitar – it hides his growing boner, and gives his hands something else to do besides groping Blaine.
He realizes he really needs to do something about that crush.
Sam is sitting in the locker room, trying to build up the courage to go talk to Blaine. He’s vaguely aware that Blaine is showing an awful lot of skin, but he tries his best not to look, because he really doesn’t need to have this conversation while trying to hide a boner.
He finally cracks and looks up for just a split second. And Blaine is wearing nothing but a wife-beater shirt and that Cheerio thong.
Sam immediately looks away and prays he won’t get hard – but fails. This has to stop. He really has to admit the truth to Blaine.
He walks up to him and averts his eyes.
“Dude, put some pants on, we need to talk.”
Blaine does as he says and follows him. Sam does his best to keep his hands in front of his crotch as they walk, to hide the hardness in his pants. He takes a deep breath and starts talking about his deeply buried secret that’s been torturing is insides for a few months now.
Blaine interrupts him: “Do you have feelings for me?”
All of Sam’s courage just melts away in front of the truth, so he finds some excuse about being a Barry Manilow fan and he’s stuck learning the words to Copacabana.
After their awesome Mamma Mia number, Sam is getting out of his costume and into his regular clothes when Blaine comes to talk to him. His hair is already starting to curl again – it couldn’t stay straight for too long.
He invites Sam over for homework and movies and Sam jumps on the occasion – maybe a bit too enthusiastically. They take Blaine’s car to his house and Sam is unusually silent. Blaine is yapping away, but Sam can’t focus on anything else than his confession.
Blaine knows Sam knows about his crush now, so he’s holding back a lot less, but Sam hadn’t found the courage to admit that the feelings were mutual.
He builds a little speech in his head and goes over it over and over.
They finally get to Blaine’s house and they decide to start with a movie because neither of them is in the mood for homework right now. Sam hasn’t the slightest idea what movie they’re watching. He’s acutely aware of Blaine sitting a bit closer to him than usual, their bodies pressing against each other, and his little speech flies out of his head.
Blaine leans over him to get the remote and his hand accidentally brushes over Sam’s crotch.
So of course, Sam pops a boner – he should really be used to it by now.
Tired of trying to hide it and being too chicken to do something about it, he straddles Blaine and kisses him. Blaine freezes in place, but finally melts into the kiss, wrapping his arms around Sam’s waist. Sam slips his tongue between Blaine’s parted lips, finally tasting him after months of longing.
Blaine moans into his mouth and Sam presses closer against him, moving to kiss a trail down his neck.
“Sam! What’s going on?” Blaine asks breathlessly.
“Don’t you like it?”
“Yeah, of course – but why?”
“I’ve been crushing on you for months” he mouths against Blaine’s neck.
“Why didn’t you say something?”
“So, can we do something about that boner?” Blaine proposes, mischievously brushing against it.